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I wanted to talk to you a little bit about the way we talk to ourselves.
I have been bingeing over the last couple of weeks Daisy Jones and the six on Amazon Prime. I don't know if anybody else has watched this. But I loved it absolutely loved it, it was a really great programme. But what was really interesting, there's no spoilers here, but essentially, Daisy Jones, the main character, she had a pretty difficult childhood, she wasn't showered with love, she was not really appreciated and talked to pretty negatively by her family. You could see so clearly see why that had led to how she was as an adult; she became an adult with a lot of issues. It was so clear to see that pattern and how being treated like that as a child, how that led to how she then was as an adult. But what got me to thinking is that we can see so clearly that when other people speak negatively to someone how that could affect them and affect their life and affect their personalities, their self worth, their confidence and everything.
But do we often stop to think about the way in which we talk to ourselves, and how that impacts our self worth, our confidence, our mental health?? Because if you think about it; if we are constantly talking negatively to ourselves, if we constantly feel like we are not enough, if we're constantly shaming ourselves, and feeling guilty of what we think we 'should' be doing and 'should not' be doing. If we're doing that constantly, day in day out, can you imagine what impact that actually has longer term on our own mental health and our own well being and our own confidence? So I think it's just a really important lesson to realise, I mean, you know, it's a bit of a cliché, when people always say "talk to yourself like you would talk to your best friend." But I think there is power in thinking about yourself as a small child, imagining that the people who are supposed to love you unconditionally, are supposed to think the world of you and are there to support you and to give you love, if those people are talking to you so negatively, then you can realise what impact that has. So if you're going to be talking to yourself in that same way, then it stands to reason it would have the same effect.
So when we're talking to ourselves like this, I know we're all guilty of it every now and again, we're all going to feel frustrated with ourselves and tell ourselves that we're stupid, or we're no good or other people are better than us, it does happen. But we need to try and catch ourselves when we do this and stop it becoming a pattern, because once it becomes a pattern, then it is going to impact our life beyond measure.
So here's my challenge for you today, when you hear yourself talking negatively to yourself telling yourself things that you would not tell someone that you loved, we need to rein that in, we need to we need to recognise that and we need to stop it and we need to try to replace it with something more positive. So if you're getting frustrated with where you are, for example if you're running a business and you're frustrated with where you are with that business and you feel like other people are really nailing it and so much further along, that everyone else is more qualified and more skilled and has more expertise... Then you could reframe that to just say, these are the people that inspire me and this is where I want to get to so what is it that I need to do in my business to bring myself up to the level of these people that I admire? So it's just a different way to try and look at it. We need to be careful with our words. Be careful what we say to ourselves because our brains, they are always listening and they are always taking in everything that we say. So if we can catch ourselves in those moments of negativity, we can really help support our mental health and our well being.
I hope this helps!
Rachel x